After spending an entire hour switching between fonts that frankly look almost identical - I finally landed on 'Lato'. And I'm still unsure about it.
This is really the perfect representation of my previous attempts to start a blog. Should I go with the white, clean header or that fancy fractal pattern I have as my desktop background? Is this plain font modern and slick or clunky and boring?
And then I get to writing the post … is it socially unacceptable for me to say ‘hello’ when, at this stage, I’m technically writing to an audience of one?
Me. That’s me. I am that audience.
Alas, here I am, hypocritically preparing to launch into a rant about how important I feel it is to take whatever is floating around in your head and string it together in the form of regular blog posts.
Maybe it’ll become a habit this time. Maybe not. Time will tell.
Although I acknowledge that I’m still a youngen, with much to learn and many mistakes to make before I become all wrinkly and wise and grey-haired and all-knowing, there is one thread I can pull from all my experiences and say with confidence.
That is – writing matters. Thoughts matter.
I dare say I’m not alone in my familiarity with the ever-draining burden of perceived insignificance. The soul-destroying trap of observing people with similar interests, doing what you do, only a thousand times better.
It’s the black hole of creativity. But the point is, that notion defies creativity itself.
To embrace a creative side is to understand that whatever you produce is by default- unique. Appropriation is inescapable, but our brains have this bizarre, innate ability to recreate; beauty into madness, tragedy into peaceful reflection, and the mundane into something extraordinary – time and time again.
When we create, we should never feel inferior. We should feel powerful.
If we’re devoting time and energy into a form of personal expression, whether it be painting, sketching, writing, designing – wherever our passions might lie – inferior becomes an impossibility.
That’s my mantra this year. I hope it’s yours too.
Traditionally, I haven’t followed through on blogs. Maybe I was trying too hard to appeal to someone other than myself. But this time I’m writing for practice, personal understanding, and healing; for a little audience of one.
So here it is, my first brutally insignificant yet immaculately important whisper into the abyss.
HG.